Transcript

It is an honor to be with you today as we open the Bible and learn from the best teacher who ever lived. This program is produced by Heralds of Hope, where our goal is to make disciples, disciples who put the teaching of Jesus into practice.

Last time, we were looking at Jesus’ teaching in Mark 10 on divorce and remarriage. If you would like to hear the first part of this teaching, please find it online or reach out to us using the contact info I will provide at the end.

Pastor J Mark divided the teaching into three sections: the confrontation, the concession, and the clarification. Let’s go with Jesus back to Genesis as he clarifies what God intended for marriage.

The Final HIGHLIGHT is,

The Clarification

In verses 6 to 12 of our text, Jesus returns to God’s design and purpose for marriage from the Creation. In Gen 2:24, “for this cause” did not refer to God’s making the first human beings “male and female,” but to God’s making Eve out of Adam’s rib. Since a woman came from a man, a man should unite with a woman to recapture their original unity. It takes both male and female to represent God and His attributes accurately and fully.

The man is commanded to leave behind his father and mother, those closest to him in flesh and blood. He forms a new union and family unit by cleaving to his wife. To cleave means to glue, bond, or adhere. This creates an unbreakable bond.

Jesus said that leaving and cleaving would result in two becoming one flesh. Deuteronomy 6:4 states, “Hear,O Israel, Yahweh our God is ONE.” Echad is the Hebrew word for one, but more precisely, it means a single entity comprising more than one part. This allows for the tri-unity of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. They have separate roles and titles, but they are ONE.

Echad also describes the reality of a man and woman becoming one. According to Ephesians 5:32, the unity of their marriage is to mirror the unity of Christ and the Church. As a result of this oneness, Jesus said, “That which God has yoked together, let not man divide.” Human beings have NO right to divide what God has joined. Sadly, marriage counselors and many pastors have allowed their emotions and preferences to override the teaching of Scripture.

The Pharisees, like many today, treated marriage too lightly. Marriage isn’t a business contract; it is an exclusive heterosexual covenant between one man and one woman, ordained and sealed by God.

In both the Old and New Testaments, marriage is a metaphor for God’s covenant relationship with his people. If you know anything about biblical covenants, they involved cutting. Animals were killed, cut in half, and placed so that the parties to the covenant could walk between them. Walking between the animal parts affirmed, “If I don’t keep my part of this covenant, let me be cut in two like these animals.”

Later, when the Twelve were alone with Jesus, they brought up the issue again. Jesus responded, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her. And if a woman divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.” Jesus gives no exceptions! Divorce is wrong, but divorce followed by remarriage is worse.

That seems pretty straightforward, but this was revolutionary for the Twelve. We know this by comparing the parallel passage in Matthew 19. In response to this teaching, they said, “If this is the way it is, then it is better not to marry.” In other words, it is better not to marry than to enter into a relationship with that much weight and meaning only to have it fail.

The disciples’ statement about not marrying strikes at the heart of God’s plan for humanity. Here’s Genesis 1:27 and 28. “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” For those who follow Christ, refusing marriage because it calls for a lifetime commitment is unacceptable.

Through the prophet Malachi, God says, “I HATE DIVORCE; it is an act of violence.” God hates divorce because it harms the couple involved, generally leaving scars that never truly heal. It is detrimental to society. Above all, it is damaging to the children involved.

We live in a day of human rights. Everyone seems to be fighting for their rights. Divorced persons fight for their right to be happy. What about the children? I maintain that they also have rights: a right to a mother and a father, and a biblical model of what home should be. Divorce deprives them of that and often leads them into self-destructive life patterns. The great majority of children appearing in juvenile court are from broken homes. The vast majority of prison inmates have the same background.

In the final analysis, however, the fundamental reason why God hates divorce is that He created marriage to illustrate the most blessed of all spiritual relationships – the union of a believing man or woman with Christ, the divine bridegroom of the church – and divorce must therefore illustrate apostasy, the falling away of a man or woman from God, which is damnation.[1]

Yet, the church today largely ignores this clear teaching. It invents all kinds of excuses to explain away what God has said. I know this teaching isn’t popular, but neither are kingdom values nor the radical discipleship Jesus demands.

I was taught that when interpreting Scripture, you use the easily understood portions to help you understand the complex and confusing passages. Most Scripture passages on divorce and remarriage teach against it. This leads me to the “exception clause” in Matthew 19.

There, Jesus mentioned sexual immorality as the only permissible grounds for divorce. But he did not command divorce. In addition, it is possible that since Matthew was writing to a predominantly Jewish audience, this exception was meant to be exercised during the Jewish betrothal period. A betrothed or engaged Jewish couple was treated as being legally married.

That’s why when Joseph discovered that Mary was pregnant, he was inclined to give her a bill of divorce. God had to intervene through a dream to let Joseph know how to respond appropriately to the situation. The marriage had not yet been consummated, and Joseph had the legal right to “divorce” Mary because he assumed her pregnancy was from another man. 

For the moment, let’s assume the exception clause is valid for today, though I don’t subscribe to that interpretation. What percentage of divorces among professing Christians are the result of sexual activity outside of marriage? Far less than the total number of divorces. And even if divorce takes place, do the Scriptures assume God sanctions remarriage?  

For centuries, the Church was a force to protect God’s marriage covenant. The Catholic Church took divorce so seriously that it broke with English King Henry VIII by refusing to allow him to marry multiple times. For Protestants, divorce was heavily discouraged and stigmatized for centuries. Yet, across the world, believers are relaxing their standards for divorce.

Today, the divorce rate among the members of God’s Church is roughly equal to that of nonbelievers. This happened because the Church no longer stigmatizes divorce. Why not? Has God’s Word changed? Author Carle Zimmerman compared the disintegration of various cultures with the parallel decline of family life in those cultures.

Eight specific patterns of domestic behavior typified the downward spiral of each culture the author studied: Marriage loses its sacredness … is frequently broken by divorce; Traditional meaning of the marriage ceremony is lost; Feminist movements abound; There is increased public disrespect for parents and authority in general; An acceleration of juvenile delinquency, promiscuity and rebellion occurs; There is a refusal of people with traditional marriages to accept family responsibilities; A growing desire for, and acceptance of, adultery is evident; There is increasing interest in, and spread of, sexual perversions and sex-related crimes.’”[2]

Did you catch where this downward spiral starts? “Marriage loses its sacredness and is frequently broken by divorce.” What are the effects? Feminist movements abound, and masculinity as a whole is considered toxic. There is increased public disrespect for parents and authority in general. Lack of commitment in marriage leads to insecurity and rebellion in children. It accelerates juvenile delinquency and promiscuity.

People with traditional marriages refuse to accept family responsibilities—we don’t want children, they’re too costly! If we have children, we won’t be able to travel, entertain, or enjoy expensive vacations. Failed marriages indicate a growing acceptance of adultery. There is increasing interest in sexual perversions and sex-related crimes. All these begin with the rejection of God’s plan for a lifelong, monogamous marriage.

So, what is the solution to the “maybe I do” mindset in our world and the church? First, acknowledge that even secular studies prove the value of lifelong monogamous marriages in a healthy culture. Research reveals that married men and women with families report more meaningful lives than their single and childless peers. Couples who take a “we-before-me” approach to married life are happier and less divorce-prone.[3]

Next, the church must teach God’s purposes for marriage. In my youth, I heard many teachings about the sacredness and permanence of marriage. Still, I don’t recall ever hearing explicit teaching about why God created marriage in the first place, other than human reproduction. That certainly is one purpose, but it’s not the primary one.

Those who are married must provide an excellent example to those looking on. Many young people today see the troubled marriages around them, and it scares them away. We must teach them that marriage is hard work, but also enriching. We must remind them that God’s plan is for marriage to be an enduring, monogamous, lifelong covenant. We enter into it in the fear of the Lord. We must teach them that divorce is not an option.

Furthermore, we must be prepared to accept the reaction of those who interpret the Scriptures differently from this teaching. Let’s proclaim the truth with an attitude of humility and gratefulness to God for what He’s given us. Let’s be prepared to experience some ridicule, scorn, and opposition graciously.

The question the Pharisees posed to Jesus still exists today. The human heart is still hardened by sin and selfishness, seeking concessions. But just as Jesus clarified God’s original intention for marriage and called us to walk in obedience. Let’s make our marriages an unequivocal “I do!”

As a child, I played with Legos, tiny building blocks that let you build various cars and buildings. Each little building block is part of a bigger structure. This lesson on the permanence of marriage reminded me of building with Legos. Using broken Legos makes the bigger structure weak and sometimes impossible to build. Marriage is the structure on which cultures are built. Marriage is important, and we value Jesus’ teaching on this topic.

Does your idea of marriage include a maybe? How can we as Christians influence our culture’s view of marriage? Do you have other comments or questions about this lesson? Here are a few ways you can contact us. Our email address is hope@heraldsofhope.org, and our website is heraldsofhope.org. There you will find “contact us,” under the partner tab on the top right. Click that to message us directly. We look forward to hearing from you.

Thanks so much for listening. As we think about Jesus revolutionary teaching on marriage, let’s go all in with Him. In John 10, Jesus tells us his sheep follow him because they know his voice. That is always our goal, especially with topics like this one, hearing the voice of our shepherd and knowing it because we know Him. 

[1] God, Divorce, and Apostasy, JM Boice, July 2014

[2] Confident Living, November 1987, p. 34

[3] Get Married, Brad Wilcox